My Mom e-mailed a forward (below) to me... it was too funny not to share. I'd say most of it is pretty true! I wonder how the 4th and any subsequent babies would go! Over the last two days, there's been 5 more job vacancies, which Michael will apply to...
We haven't heard any more from any of the other colleges. We're planning on moving out of here by the end of May, whether or not Michael has a job. We'll be heading to LA if he doesn't have a job, though still with the hopes of possibly getting hired for a FT job by June or July... if there's nothing by July, we'll stay in LA for at least a year.



BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as

your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

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Preparing for the Birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last

time, breathing didn't do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

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The Layette:

1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them,

and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and

discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

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Worries:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper,

a frown--you pick up the baby

2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten

to wake your firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to

rewind the mechanical swing.
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Pacifier:

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until

you can go home and wash and boil it.

2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it

off with some juice from the baby's bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

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Diapering:

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour,

whether they need it or not.

2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.

3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to

complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

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Activities:

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing,

Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.

2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.

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Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter,

you call home five times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to

leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

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At Home:

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child

isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children

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Swallowing Coins (a favorite):

1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays

2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.

3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

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Pass this on to everyone you know who has children . . . or everyone who KNOWS someone who has had children . .

(The older the mother, the funnier this is!)

GRANDCHILDREN: God's reward
for allowing your children to live!